Another strong indicator for Repairing Broken Trust was when clients were able to let down their protective walls. Being able to be open to new experiences, to trust self and others, was a crucial condition for Making human contact.
"(What happened to your wall?) In some areas it’s still there. Not so thickly, it gets narrowed and I guess it gets more transparent. And in some place it’s not there at all. – Reconnecting, yeah, like learning to have a so-called normal whatever normal is, normal as in having an intimate relationship with somebody, having good friendship with somebody, having a relationship with your family, work relationship" (Carol).
Because it is something that I have not experienced before. I am trying to open myself up to it. The fact that he touches me and rubs parts of my body that nobody ever has been allowed to touch before, is all put down to fighting what I feel and my past experiences and just letting it go and seeing what happens from it (Krista).
In order to be able to have connections with people other than the therapist, some important shifts in the self-object needs of clients had to take place. For example it was important to realise that “it’s ok to be disappointed” (Katherine 3/1). When a person’s self system is strong enough to self-soothe, self-acknowledge, and self-nurture, a disappointment from another person will not be experienced as a ‘fatal’ injury.
CONNECTING, the main concern of DID clients in this study meant in this stage that they were able to Repairing Broken Trust. For learning to trust the ‘other’ therapists needed to pay attention to transferential dynamics between their client and the other person. Skilful interpretation than helped clients to distinguish between ‘then’ and ‘now’. That might mean for some re-visiting relationships and events that had shaped their clients mistrust in relationships.