Tactics Used By Sexual Predators

A big concern for survivors of sexual abuse is how to keep your own children safe from sexual predators. On the first glance, two difficulties spring to mind.

  • On one hand survivors could easily be 'over vigilant' and not let their child out of their view. Such behaviour could greatly restrict the child's social development. Spontaneity, socialising, exploring, and experimenting could be hindered and an important source of self-confidence and self-esteem could remain untapped.
  • On the other hand survivors could be not vigilant enough. They might be desensitised to dangerous clues and give their child too much freedom and not enough supervision.

So what are the tactics used?
Deceptive Trust Development: It seems to be clear that sexual perpetrators plan the assault far in advance and are willing to invest time in preparing the child. They allow time for the development of trust between them and the child so that their chances for access to the child for a sexual encounter increase.

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Dec 08/Jan 09 Edition: Husbands, Lovers, Partners

Welcome to the January 20, 2009 edition of recovery from childhood sexual abuse.This edition was dedicated to exploring issues that arise for survivors in their relationships, with husbands, partners, or lovers. I would like to thank all readers who posted so generously. Again the contributions are diverse and interesting. I am looking forward reading your feedback if you have any!


My True Self: Boundaries vs. Scaffolding posted at My True Self. Have you ever feared that setting boundaries keeps you from connecting with others? This blog post looks at the purpose of boundaries in relationships and suggests that maybe scaffolding is a better term to use. Check it out!

Co and counter dependency posted at imaginif. Megan Bayliss explains in detail the terms co-dependency and counter dependency and talks about the need to have your adult relationships 'sorted' to be a good role model for your children.

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Positive Steps For Mental Health

Positive steps to mental health
A lot is written about getting well and keeping well when you struggle with mental health problems, whether they are caused by abuse and neglect or passed on genetically.

I found this great card on the blog of Elaine Nicholles. I think is a great, simple overview of all the good things you can do to keep on top of everything.

Maybe the start of the New Year is a good time to shape up your daily routine and make a conscious decision to cover these steps.

Why not print out the poster and put it up where you can easily remind yourself of what to do next!

Go Well – and let me know how it's going!